Er. Hey. I'm @aidanleape from the twitter here for Newcastle v Everton. Kick off is at 5:30pm

We've got this evening game here, then we've all got just enough time to lob some more god forsaken dry turkey down before Saints v Arsenal

We're on BT tonight, so I've got Jake prancing round the bloody Starship Enterprise. Is that a good enough pop culture reference? Please?

Ian Wright stood in a salmon pink shirt next to a floating holographic league table. Nothing says spirt of the season more I guess...

Went through my YouTube history to find you some intro music. I found this. Don't ask. No really

I suppose you want some teams then. Let me just grab a handful of Cheeslets and a block of Turkish Delight, because, you know, Christmas.

Newcastle: Elliot, Janmaat, Mbemba, Coloccini, Dummett, Sissoko, Anita, Colback, Wijnaldum, Pérez, Yellow Card (AKA. Mitrovic)

And Everton: Howard, Coleman, Stones, Funes Mori, Baines, Cleverley, Barry, Mirallas, Barkley, Lennon, Lukaku

BT have got so many floating things and sweeping cameras. I feel seasick. And that's not the Bailey's I'm pretty sure.

We're now on about Mohammed Ali. He'll be playing left back for Everton right? No. Or are we just skipping the build up.