Nick Knowles: Every Kind Of People: The Review



Hey hey kids. @aidanleape here to bring you a cutting piece of music commentary. Now, if you weren't living your life under a rock for the last week, you'd still have missed this, but loveable Lotto balling, DIY super-guru Nick Knowles has decided to have a bash at the music game. Naturally. His debut album, titled Every Kind Of People was released last Friday, I'm about to review it...

Now, if you haven't read these before, I'll go through the album track by track and give my thoughts. As I feel should be law, I have never listened to this album before, and so, the words you read will be my first thoughts on the songs. Think of it as some kind of bizarre game of Word Association. It is nearly Christmas right...

One final piece of order before we get going. I'm going into this with a totally open mind. I don't want to give this album a hatchet job. Scratch that. I really want to hate this. Anyway, I've got Spotify open. I've got a branded American Larger Beer open. Let's get this high fangled digital disc a'spinning.

Track 1: Every Kinda People: That's right. The title track is spelt wrong. Inconspicuous start there. First impressions. The jangly guitar wouldn't be out of place on Bid TV. It seems very safely aimed at the middle aged female market. Nothing offensive. Onto the vocals. It's a bit deep. Like unnaturally. You can tell it's dearest Nick from the Lotto, but it's just a bit off. And a bit Texan

Anyway, lyrically, this one won't be upending any trees. Trust me that. TL;DR on it. Life would be crap if we were all the same. It's good to have different people, to "Make what life's about." Whatever that means. I'm going to take it as a jangly keyboard/guitar ditty warning about the issue of incest. Interesting start. Good news. It's the single too. So there is a video...

I take it back actually. It's not Bid TV music. The guitar sounds like the sort of thing you'd be shown on a Work away day about the benefits of the new computerised filing system. Not really enough to be pinning a turn of career on me thinks. Anyway. Onwards and upwards.

Track 2: You're The First, The Last, My Everything Yeh. That's right. It's a cover of the Barry White classic. Don't even ask why. This is more hammy than a bacon sandwich with added ham, and a slice of gammon on top as soon as Nick off of the Lotto (you know, lovely Nick) goes to spit out 'Everything' first time. It's wobbling more than an unset blancmange. Not great.

This isn't exactly redefining the song really. In fact. It's kind of ruining it. It was never a great song, but at least the original had that disco vibe going for it. This one sort of has a depressing Celtic vibe that makes me think of a cross between Danny Boy and You'll Never Walk Alone. Anyway, Nick off of the Lotto finishes how he begins, warbling the lyric 'Last.' Not for me Jeff.

HANG ABOUT. THESE ARE ALL COVERS. Every Kinda People is apparently a Robert Palmer hit. I'll be honest, I thought he was better than that lyrically. The first song was the equivalent of the Green Jelly Babies, or the Bounty. Shunned to the bottom of the packet. I'm stunned he's write something that inoffensive. To be fair, when Robert does it, it's still shit. So I'll let Nick off this time

Right, now I know this is covers, with no artistic merit or effort from Nick off of the Lotto, I can really stick the boot in. Good news. Pass me another Lager Beer.